Being Comfortable With Negative Feelings

As human beings, we all move towards that which is familiar. It’s a natural instinct to seek out familiar things because we are comfortable with them – be they people, places, or things. The same is true of feelings.

Feelings that are familiar give us a sense of security. Our brain tells us “I know this feeling! This is familiar. This is safe.” The feelings we are familiar with were shaped by our families when we were growing up.

If you lived in a family where the motto was “Stand up for yourself,” when someone insulted you, chances are you learned to fight back, and you’re familiar and comfortable doing so. However, if your family upbringing was “Don’t make trouble,” then it’s more comfortable for you to not say anything and accept the insult.

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